After everything I have been through, these women were not critical. However, the women who supported me most were the ones who didn’t even give birth to me. I have made countless mistakes, stupid decisions, and been selfish on multiple occasions. With that being said, I realized this- Maternity does not determine a motherly relationship unconditional love does. These are the things that most people get from their mothers, and what some get from other figures. The age I’m at right now requires a lot of support, love and encouragement to get by. Stress is almost overbearing while reality gives me slaps in the face daily. I am currently in one of the most important phases of my life that basically dictates my future. Recently, however I have come to a realization about motherly relationships.
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I continued wishing women who were important in my life a happy Mother’s Day and let them know how much I appreciated them. I accepted my situation, but I didn’t approve. I was so happy to see that there was a happy family, but as I said earlier- I didn’t have what they had. When I went to my friends’ houses and saw how their mother and them were so close, it tore me up on the inside. Since there was no possible way to obtain this relationship, I beat myself up over it. Mothers who describe their pregnancy say that the bond that develops during pregnancy is one that cannot be felt with anyone else. For the longest time, I believed birth was the true binder between a mother and child. I desperately craved this mother-daughter relationship that couldn’t be broken.
#SUFJAN STEVENS AM I GAY FOR GOD FULL#
From my father, step-mothers, grandmothers, my friends’ moms or close relatives, I could never find full satisfaction with my situation-especially on Mother’s Day. Other people, both men and women, assumed a motherly role they didn’t have to take on. he tries to act natural, sliding an arm around your waist, but you can feel his slight nervousness.For the last 19 years, I haven’t had my blood mother in my life. not that you haven’t sat on his lap before, he just… didn’t expect it. not too much or visible, but his heart definitely starts to beat faster, and his face starts to feel hot. you get a neck kiss in return for his lame jokes.ĭILUC. his teasing and cheesy way of flirting can never miss out, so you totally expected that reaction from him. oh, but he has to mention that his lap must be your favorite place to sit. similar to ayato, pays almost no mind to it.
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he doesn’t let you stand up from there, it’s just way too comfortable for him. even though it was you who initiated it, it’s him who took control of the situation. he just holds you by your hips, and makes you face him, with your legs on either side of his hips. it doesn’t surprise him at all, almost teases you about it. it makes him feel a bit of satisfaction that your plan backfired, and he flustered you, instead of the opposite <3ĬHILDE. doesn’t break the conversation, but knows damn well that you are flustered. he acts so naturally when you just sit down on his lap, just puts his arm around your waist, very casually. Keep reading AAAAAAAAAAAAAA i love him i want him NOW he's such a chaotic lil sweetheartĪYATO. if you’re not too busy in the morning he would prefer if you helped him get ready instead of the servants, while they are nice to talk to, there’s nothing like your fiancé tying your hair back for you and setting out your clothes.but his real goodbyes are behind closed doors, where he can kiss you as long as he wants to before stepping outside. whenever he goes away on business he says goodbye to you and ayaka at the front of the estate, making sure his beloved partner to be and his sister have everything they need before he leaves.
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i feel like he’s a very big fan of sweets! he’ll (privately of course) plant so many kisses on your face if you gift him a box of his favorites.in fact he’s very prideful about being with you, always looking forward to introducing you to his guests. being raised on the principles of the kamisato clan means he knows what it means to be a honorable and true young man, ayato will never do anything to bring dishonor to your relationship or your name.but if you two are betrothed then the gossip is more about how you give him quick kisses behind your fan or how master ayato hosts private dinners for the two of you so you can feed him all his favorite food.you’re either officially betrothed to the head of the yashiro commission and kamisato clan, or he’s very obviously courting you - i say obviously because his servants have spread gossip about the endless letters he writes you.i don’t really know anything about him but i’m weirdly obsessed with him so please enjoy! obviously i took his personality from my own headcanons and some voice lines about him hehe :) gender neutral, fluff, some suggestive themes